Post by Alex Lange on Jan 15, 2024 12:44:06 GMT -5
"Whatcha lookin' for?"
The question, directed to one Ling Xing Zhou, more commonly referred to as Alex Lange, came from none other than her younger sister Anna.
At only twelve, the young girl already had a way of looking upon her older sister as though she were an animal to be pitied, and occasionally feared...
Especially now, as the older sister ran her fingers along the utensils in the drawer, in an urgent search. Alex didn't stop, and for a few moment she didn't
acknowledge her younger sibling, until it seemed she remembered something, which compelled her to stop.
"I'm looking for the fork. My fork, Anna have you seen my fork?" Alex asked, she took a fork from the drawer, and held it towards Anna.
"It's like this one, but it's the one I use for lunch. There is a smoothed chip on the side..."
"Oh, well... Why don't you use this one for now? It's the same!" Anna responded, this time her voice taking on the tone of a kids show host addressing
the audience of toddlers on the other side of the screen, bright smile included.
Alex looked on, she was confused, the tone wasn't what she was expecting, and she couldn't really say she understood its purpose or even the suggestion
she not user her fork. She looked at the fork, and then up at Anna again. After almost thirteen seconds, the elder sibling opened her mouth slowly, and
spoke evenly. "It's not mine."
"Uhh, but we all share forks here, right? Everything is everyone's, right? So, you can use any fork."
"I don't want to use any fork. I want to use my fork. Dad said that I can use this fork, a long time ago, he said it was mine. I asked mom too, and she said
yes it can be my fork." Alex explained, although her tone was nothing intense, her hands did shake ever so slightly. It wasn't so much that she was angry
at her sister, instead she just didn't like the situation as a whole. It felt... Deliberate and... She couldn't quite place however else she felt.
"Alex, grow up." That was their mother's voice, entering the kitchen with a bored grace she had developed since being inducted into the rather lavish lifestyle
of the Lange family. "And don't point sharp things at your sister, you'll scare her."
"It's okay mom, I'm not scared she's just-"
"It's not about growing up. It's my fork, you know it's my fork." Alex turned to her mother, fork still in hand. Though, she had shifted the utensil further along
her hand, until the prongs were clutched in her palm. Gently, she pressed upon them, feeling the dulled ends poke her skin. "If you didn't want me to have it,
why did you let me have it?"
"It IS about growing up, Alex. You have to learn to compromise sometimes, you can't always have your way."
"Mom's right, sometimes you have to give the remote to someone else so they can have a turn to watch the TV." Anna smiled, trying to defuse the situation, but
if it worked she wouldn't really know because Alex didn't move, beyond the subtle pulsing of her clenched hand. The younger girl turned to her mother, Dahlia's
arms were crossed as she approached Alex slowly, and gently removed the fork from her daughter's hand.
The concern was unfounded, Alex had never been violent, nor was she prone to threatening to harm others. Instead, it was likely a sign of how much distance had
formed between the two, that Dahlia was concerned that Alex would do something to her younger sibling. Anna sighed, feeling bad. She had only been trying to
help her older sister, it was only just a fork right? Dahlia remained by Alex, both looking into each other's eyes. Despite the disconnect, the mother knew her daughter
well. She could tell just how... Stretched, Alex was in the moment, like a rubber band, ready to snap. She could rarely predict, or track, the reasoning, but she could
often tell when Alex was at her limits.
"It's my fork. I don't want to share it. I have my own television. I don't want to share it. If it wasn't my television, I would have to share it." Alex said, her fingers
running over her palms, having been relieved of the fork.
"Alex what kind of sister are you? What kind of sister do you want to be?" The words came from the patriarch himself, Alex turned towards him.
"I can't believe I'm teaching an 18 year old about sharing..." Dahlia said, under her breath, but performatively so; she may as well have said it to the girl's face. She
could feel the rubber band stretching even further, as Alex gently pressed her hip against the drawer handle, allowing it to dig into her skin. A bruise was likely forming, not that the girl cared very much.
Anna walked over to Alex, and set down the formerly missing fork by the counter. At this point though, Alex had lost her appetite, and mostly she wanted to just go
away. This wasn't an uncommon occurrence, in fact she had done her best to secure what she could, and set clear boundaries so she wouldn't be faced with such issues.
Though, it never seemed to be enough, and although she spoke up for herself, she couldn't help get the feeling she was in the wrong, even if she didn't think she was.
If everyone had a problem with her, then... Odds were she was the problem, that's how it felt anyway.
"I want to be the best sister I can be. I am trying." Alex responded.
"You must try in a different way, or try harder. Look at you, is a fork so important that you must have the family against you like this?" Siegfried Lange stared her
down, frosty blue eyes throwing phantom daggers at the girl.
There was a long spell of silence, which lasted for almost a minute. It wasn't unusual. Siegfried, much like Alex, was not afraid of silence. Both had different approaches, and
reasons. Siegfried knew the power of silence, the way it could coax information, or build feelings of unease. He wielded silence like a weapon against any who stood
against him. Meanwhile, Alex simply didn't... Know better. Or, more accurately, she didn't care. If she needed more time to think, then she would be silent, if she thought
someone hadn't answered her question to her satisfaction she could wait. Hence, when they both stared each other down, the duration of the silence was unpredictable.
"I won't eat a meal now anymore. I don't need my fork." Alex spoke after forty-three seconds, after which she walked away, back to her room. She had snacks regardless, so
she would just have some of those until dinner time perhaps.
The rest of the family remained in the kitchen. Anna tried to explain her position as best she could. She had been trying to teach her sister the lesson of compromise and
sharing which had been a focus of the previous week of school. This wasn't a random idea, it was tied to her lack of understanding of her older sister's situation. Dahlia
had spoken at length to Anna, about how she needed to be patient with her older sister. In these conversations, she had described Alex as having 'quirks', and Anna being
who she was and as young and naïve as she was, had been trying to help... As if Alex simply didn't know better, or was simply lacking in training like a pet.
Dahlia and Siegfried consoled the girl as best she could, commending her for trying to help, but ultimately expressing their lack of belief in the older sibling. The patriarch
noted the girl's lack of emotion, assuming she hadn't even learned from the moment. Anna wasn't so sure, although mature for her age, she was still a child, she wanted to
believe her sister wasn't so... Alien. Dahlia sighed, running a hand through Anna's hair. If there was one thing she knew, it was that Alex wasn't unaffected by the moment.
In fact, she had likely been the most affected... Though as guilty as she felt thinking it, Dahlia didn't want to deal with Alex right then. She clutched Anna even harder, sighing
softly, knowing that Alex was likely alone and confused. And crying.
"I was just trying..." Anna sighed.
"I know, sweetie... Me too..." Dahlia cooed, 'So was Alex.' She thought. "We... We're all just trying... God help us."
The question, directed to one Ling Xing Zhou, more commonly referred to as Alex Lange, came from none other than her younger sister Anna.
At only twelve, the young girl already had a way of looking upon her older sister as though she were an animal to be pitied, and occasionally feared...
Especially now, as the older sister ran her fingers along the utensils in the drawer, in an urgent search. Alex didn't stop, and for a few moment she didn't
acknowledge her younger sibling, until it seemed she remembered something, which compelled her to stop.
"I'm looking for the fork. My fork, Anna have you seen my fork?" Alex asked, she took a fork from the drawer, and held it towards Anna.
"It's like this one, but it's the one I use for lunch. There is a smoothed chip on the side..."
"Oh, well... Why don't you use this one for now? It's the same!" Anna responded, this time her voice taking on the tone of a kids show host addressing
the audience of toddlers on the other side of the screen, bright smile included.
Alex looked on, she was confused, the tone wasn't what she was expecting, and she couldn't really say she understood its purpose or even the suggestion
she not user her fork. She looked at the fork, and then up at Anna again. After almost thirteen seconds, the elder sibling opened her mouth slowly, and
spoke evenly. "It's not mine."
"Uhh, but we all share forks here, right? Everything is everyone's, right? So, you can use any fork."
"I don't want to use any fork. I want to use my fork. Dad said that I can use this fork, a long time ago, he said it was mine. I asked mom too, and she said
yes it can be my fork." Alex explained, although her tone was nothing intense, her hands did shake ever so slightly. It wasn't so much that she was angry
at her sister, instead she just didn't like the situation as a whole. It felt... Deliberate and... She couldn't quite place however else she felt.
"Alex, grow up." That was their mother's voice, entering the kitchen with a bored grace she had developed since being inducted into the rather lavish lifestyle
of the Lange family. "And don't point sharp things at your sister, you'll scare her."
"It's okay mom, I'm not scared she's just-"
"It's not about growing up. It's my fork, you know it's my fork." Alex turned to her mother, fork still in hand. Though, she had shifted the utensil further along
her hand, until the prongs were clutched in her palm. Gently, she pressed upon them, feeling the dulled ends poke her skin. "If you didn't want me to have it,
why did you let me have it?"
"It IS about growing up, Alex. You have to learn to compromise sometimes, you can't always have your way."
"Mom's right, sometimes you have to give the remote to someone else so they can have a turn to watch the TV." Anna smiled, trying to defuse the situation, but
if it worked she wouldn't really know because Alex didn't move, beyond the subtle pulsing of her clenched hand. The younger girl turned to her mother, Dahlia's
arms were crossed as she approached Alex slowly, and gently removed the fork from her daughter's hand.
The concern was unfounded, Alex had never been violent, nor was she prone to threatening to harm others. Instead, it was likely a sign of how much distance had
formed between the two, that Dahlia was concerned that Alex would do something to her younger sibling. Anna sighed, feeling bad. She had only been trying to
help her older sister, it was only just a fork right? Dahlia remained by Alex, both looking into each other's eyes. Despite the disconnect, the mother knew her daughter
well. She could tell just how... Stretched, Alex was in the moment, like a rubber band, ready to snap. She could rarely predict, or track, the reasoning, but she could
often tell when Alex was at her limits.
"It's my fork. I don't want to share it. I have my own television. I don't want to share it. If it wasn't my television, I would have to share it." Alex said, her fingers
running over her palms, having been relieved of the fork.
"Alex what kind of sister are you? What kind of sister do you want to be?" The words came from the patriarch himself, Alex turned towards him.
"I can't believe I'm teaching an 18 year old about sharing..." Dahlia said, under her breath, but performatively so; she may as well have said it to the girl's face. She
could feel the rubber band stretching even further, as Alex gently pressed her hip against the drawer handle, allowing it to dig into her skin. A bruise was likely forming, not that the girl cared very much.
Anna walked over to Alex, and set down the formerly missing fork by the counter. At this point though, Alex had lost her appetite, and mostly she wanted to just go
away. This wasn't an uncommon occurrence, in fact she had done her best to secure what she could, and set clear boundaries so she wouldn't be faced with such issues.
Though, it never seemed to be enough, and although she spoke up for herself, she couldn't help get the feeling she was in the wrong, even if she didn't think she was.
If everyone had a problem with her, then... Odds were she was the problem, that's how it felt anyway.
"I want to be the best sister I can be. I am trying." Alex responded.
"You must try in a different way, or try harder. Look at you, is a fork so important that you must have the family against you like this?" Siegfried Lange stared her
down, frosty blue eyes throwing phantom daggers at the girl.
There was a long spell of silence, which lasted for almost a minute. It wasn't unusual. Siegfried, much like Alex, was not afraid of silence. Both had different approaches, and
reasons. Siegfried knew the power of silence, the way it could coax information, or build feelings of unease. He wielded silence like a weapon against any who stood
against him. Meanwhile, Alex simply didn't... Know better. Or, more accurately, she didn't care. If she needed more time to think, then she would be silent, if she thought
someone hadn't answered her question to her satisfaction she could wait. Hence, when they both stared each other down, the duration of the silence was unpredictable.
"I won't eat a meal now anymore. I don't need my fork." Alex spoke after forty-three seconds, after which she walked away, back to her room. She had snacks regardless, so
she would just have some of those until dinner time perhaps.
The rest of the family remained in the kitchen. Anna tried to explain her position as best she could. She had been trying to teach her sister the lesson of compromise and
sharing which had been a focus of the previous week of school. This wasn't a random idea, it was tied to her lack of understanding of her older sister's situation. Dahlia
had spoken at length to Anna, about how she needed to be patient with her older sister. In these conversations, she had described Alex as having 'quirks', and Anna being
who she was and as young and naïve as she was, had been trying to help... As if Alex simply didn't know better, or was simply lacking in training like a pet.
Dahlia and Siegfried consoled the girl as best she could, commending her for trying to help, but ultimately expressing their lack of belief in the older sibling. The patriarch
noted the girl's lack of emotion, assuming she hadn't even learned from the moment. Anna wasn't so sure, although mature for her age, she was still a child, she wanted to
believe her sister wasn't so... Alien. Dahlia sighed, running a hand through Anna's hair. If there was one thing she knew, it was that Alex wasn't unaffected by the moment.
In fact, she had likely been the most affected... Though as guilty as she felt thinking it, Dahlia didn't want to deal with Alex right then. She clutched Anna even harder, sighing
softly, knowing that Alex was likely alone and confused. And crying.
"I was just trying..." Anna sighed.
"I know, sweetie... Me too..." Dahlia cooed, 'So was Alex.' She thought. "We... We're all just trying... God help us."
